Meandering Mollie – Invitation to Party!

Lady Litchfield Love of Litchfield, Staffordshire and now Empress of Bordeaux, France (currently residing in her protectorate, South Africa), hereby formally requests the honour of your presence at her

Meandering Mollie Party

WINE, WOMEN, SONG AND LOVE

Please join Lady Litchi and her consorts Jittery Jangles, Senseless Sabre and Charlatan Shadow in celebrating the successful Rescue and Recovery Operation performed by the incredible IARB (International Animal Rescue Brigade).

All beloved readers may RSVP to this most prestigious of events.  Amusement shall be provided in the form of masterful match-making by the ever loving Litchi who will be accepting responses up to and including Wednesday, the 3^rd day of October, this 2012’th year of Animaldom.

Special requests are hereby sent to:

Meandering Mollie

Errant Easy

Dapper Doggy

Maestro Misaki  

Gallant Guineas

Admirable Alfie

Sagacious Sammy

Zealous Zena

Jaunty Jet

Reliable Ruby

The above honoured guests either formed the acclaimed IARB or, as in the case of Mollie and Easy, the instigators of said Rescue & Recover.

RSVP’s to the amuse bouche will be accepted via written reply via the provided “comments” section attached to this invitation.  However, acceptance of RSVP’s will only be accepted upon receipt of photograph displaying aspirant attendant in appropriate attire.  Such outstanding photographic delights should be forwarded to longlife@dcrprocess.co.za

A PREVIEW OF THE GUILTY PLEASURES TO BE ENJOYED AT THE PARTY!

Litchi’s Lament – Love Ain’t Easy!

Good news!  Bad news!  Then some good news again! 

Firstly, the international efforts of Alfie, Misaki, Investigator Piggies, Sammy and Zena, paid off.  Mollie has been FOUND!  Doggy is vindicated (although he’s still at war, having plundered Portugal and now entering French territory).

DOGGY’S INVASION

The recovery of Mollie is fantastic news but leads, sadly, to the Bad News!

The Dognapper, the *“Monster Wanting Lobster”, was EASY!.

For Litchi, this is bad news indeed.  Mollie is a stunning blonde, with flashy dress sense.  Litchi, on the other hand, is not even brunette, she is pitch black.  She has never been seen parading any sort of fashion.  Easy is a most handsome Weimeramer and had, in Litchi’s opinion, been displaying some very forward courting behaviour towards her.  Read the following excerpts from comments on her blog and decide for yourselves.

• Litchi you look gorgeous – what’s your phone number?
• hehe, got it…with my fabulous tail-antenna    thanks, Litchi

And, after having written a most beautiful poem, with which Litchi was rather smitten, he replied:

• haha thanks!!! Hoped Litchi would like it

Litchi believed True Love (or, at minimum, True Lust) had been found.  But love, it appears, is never that Easy!  Just look at the SMS between Easy and Mollie

However, I told you there was a last piece of good news.  Dapper Doggy, through all the turmoil of war, in his Gentledog manner, posted the following:

“Bordeaux will be spared and it’ll be now an official South African Colony under the rule of Lady Litchi”

With limited space to accommodate all the wine in Bordeaux, Lady Litchfield Love will be throwing a celebratory PARTY!  She has invited all the wonderful investigators, low flying cats and brave Princesses to this party, along with Sir Doggy (who, being black himself, may well suite Litchi’s taste better than a Weimerama) and, to ensure that, if Sir Doggy were to fall for Princess Zena, Jetty the Gentleman, whom Lady Litchi believes to be a most suitable companion for her.  Jetty the Gentleman is a Rescue Dog and would, therefore, understand her occasional quirks, left over from hard days on the street.  Jetty is also, Jet Black – how perfect is that!

Easy, Lady Litchfield Love, of Litchfield Stafordshire and, now, Bordeaux, France (not forgetting South Africa, from where she rules her colonies) hereby requests your attendance at the Mollie Merriment Party, where she shall, as a true Lady, hold her head high and accept the gracious advances of Dapper Doggy and Jetty the Gentleman.

As proof that she has already forgotten this heartbreaking affair, she offers a photograph of her kissing on the couch with her rebound fling.

*PS – the “Monster Wanting Lobster” is courtesy of the fabulous site Colonialist, who had left a comment saying “What Monster wants Lobster??”.  I laughed so hard I simply had to include it!

Never have So Many been called upon to Help So Few!

Never in the history of Dogdom, have so many been called upon to risk their lives for so few (well one, to be exact).

Woof World III is on the verge of breakout and not, as one might assume, due to border disputes, greed induced arguments over mineral bone resources or mans dogs’ inherent need for battle.  No, my dear readers, WWIII looks to take the stage due to Paw Tokens!  The ultimate in valuable currency for competition addicted dogs the world over!  Oh, and lest we forget, the capture, “potential” hostage situation and now Kidnapping of Mollie.

• Doggy invaded Mollie’s village, captured her and held her at his Castle.
• He then brazenly took her to dine at the finest trash cans in town.
  • This, needless to say, surprised all in Animal Kingdom, who had, thus far, assumed Mollie to be a Hostage.
  • However, one should not forget the Stockholm Syndrome (hostages falling for their captors).
  • Mollie, subsequently, went missing!
  • Fear reigned through the nations.  Dogs, cats and guinea pigs mobilized their forces.  So many animals, so little time, only one to rescue!

Doggy threatened WWIII, stating that his honor had been compromised, insisting that Mollie had left happy, full and content.  He provided the following proof of her being escorted by the War Elephants on her return trip.

And then, oh the horror, a ransom note was received.  All paws had been pointed at Doggy and then, this:

The Frightening Reality – A RANSOM NOTE!

Doggy is indeed innocent (although I still suspect that his intentions towards Mollie were not quite so).  Rumours having been flying about kissing by the trash cans.

Many a Rescue Animal is involved in the hunt for Mollie.  Follow their death defying escapades and catch up on previous news here:

War Horns  – By Doggy

War Update – By Doggy

Kidnap By Mollie

Call to World Invasion – By Doggy

News Reports By The Piggies at Hutch a Good Life

Investigation By Misaki

Investigation By Sam

Investigation By Zena, The Princess 

When is a Hostage Situation a Dinner Date?

Well, the saga continues.  Doggy and his army of Orcs and Elephants, joined his Sniper Dogs at Mollie’s place and, with such a fearsome crowd behind him, easily captured her.

Doggy – with full blown army!

He says he has not taken her hostage and supplied the following photograph as proof that she is being treated humanely dogely.  However, having muttered something about her “not being able to leave the castle”, I fear that “free will” is most certainly being compromised.

Mollie, in Sir Doggy’s castle, doing her Cleopatra / Molliepatra impersonation

In an attempt to make us believe that she is not, in fact, a hostage, Doggy tells us that he is taken her out for dinner!  So, the question is:

“Is a Dinner Date a Hostage Situation?” 

Reporters from Hutch Hurround the World News are surrounding the “castle” but, as none of us have been able to gain access, it is proving to be a somewhat daunting task to ascertain the exact nature of Doggy’s intentions.  You know how Boy Dogs can be!

To assist us, Lady Litchfield has requested the services of Jetty the Gentleman.  Litchi had originally approached Jetty for “Hostage Negotiation”, however, as we can ascertain neither Doggy’s, nor Mollie’s intentions, we are weary to jump to conclusions.  Jetty the Gentleman is well versed in such situations, having received his Investigator Certification from the Scooby Doo Academy.

These qualifications, together with the fact that Jet is a most fabulous example of a Rescue Dog, make him the perfect go-to-guy at this point.

Stay tuned for updates, as and when we receive them.

Doggy’s Dilemma

Well, it seems that Litchi has found herself a bona-fide job.  Good for her.  About time she earned her kibbles here.!

Although previously self-appointed, it appears that her title is now official.  She is:

Lady Litchifield Love – Mediator to the Dogs

Mollie and Doggy are still at it.  The international crisis has not yet been averted.  After many grueling days of court cases (presided over by Judge Sammy) and mediation, the official Litchi Treaty was signed.  All seemed good in the world!

International politics being what they are, has resulted in a further dispute.

Mollies latest question for Paw Tokens was “Who originally sang this and what year was it released?“.  Doggy, always quick of the mark, got the first portion perfectly correct.  He neglected, unfortunately to give the Date of Release.

Each correct participant received Two Paw Tokens.  This did not include Doggy.  Being somewhat of a drama-queen (alright, he’s not a queen – maybe a Drama-Dog), Doggy threw a perfectly heartbreaking hissy-fit.  Exerpts of his laments include:

“My heart aches, I’m in tears, tears blur my vision as I write this….I’ll be praying for you and for the snipers….”

As you can see, he still has snipers surrounding Mollies place.  Of course Alfie, the cat, is thoroughly enjoying chasing their laser beams but Mollie lives in fear.

Lady Litchi has offered the following compromise, hoping the 2^nd Litchi Treaty will be signed soon:

Litchi Treaty Two:

• Mollies competition question clearly consisted of two parts, the first being the singers and the second, the date of release.
• Doggy, without doubt, got the first portion of this question correct
• As Mollie offered Two Paw Tokens to those who correctly answered both questions, it seems reasonable to assume that there was a Paw Token per portion.
• Mollie, therefore, agrees to offer Doggy One Paw Token for answering one question correctly.
• As acceptance of this agreement, Doggy refrains from pitiable laments, agrees to “man-up” like the Gentledog he has previously proved himself to be and re-enters the competition in the spirit of good fun everywhere.
• Mollie, for her part in the mischief, knowingly driving Doggy to extreme levels of psychosis, offers a public apology.  Declarations of love, at this point, would also be acceptable.

Litchi requests that fellow readers provide their thoughts regarding this agreement.  Comments may be lodged here or at either Mollie’s or Doggy’s blog.

It is vital that all International Litchi Treaty’s are open to public comment.

Pawsible Deniability!

Life is about ascertaining the best “plausible deniability” available.  Plausible Deniability allows you to do or get what you want, with limited repercussions.  My menagerie of animals taught me this lesson very well indeed.  Whoever you interrogate, will always point the paw at the next in line.  Each appears to have perfectly good Pawsible Deniability for the bird flying around the house, missing food items or occasional “accident”.  As the zoo empowered me with this valuable tool, I shall from here on out, rely on Pawsible Deniability for all blunders.  My finger shall now point at the paws of:

Litchi – First in but ruler of the Couch and her Bed only!

Jittery Jangles – Second in and jittery about everything.  Ruler of Nothing!

Sabre – Third in and Ruler Of All (except the couch and Litchi’s bed)

Shadow – Last in (so far) with enough womanly wiles to allow Sabre to think he’s the Ruler when she’s the Boss!

Each one of these sweethearts (or monsters – depending on the day or crime committed) is a testament to how wonderful and endearing rescue animals can be.  They feature regularly on these posts, in the hope that anyone thinking of extending their family considers going the Adoption route.  Of course, if you intend “showing” or “working” a pedigree animal, then a reputable breeder is clearly the best option.  However, if you are simply looking for a companion, the No-Kill Shelters are over-flowing and each one adopted, allows another “animal in need” the vital assistance these organisations can provide.

At this point, I would like to Highly Un-recommend allowing awards to pile up, imposing upon yourself an outrageously daunting task.  I hereby confirm that this action will leave you brain-dead, causing you to press “Publish” before checking links.  In light of my new found “Pawsible Deniability”, I take absolutely no responsibility for the fact that I provided a completely incorrect address for Jodi Stone’s site, which was supposed to be Heart Like a Dog and is definitely worth popping over to visit.

My finger now points directly at Litchi, Jangles, Sabre and Shadow, one of whom must, clearly, be responsible for this error in judgement.  I am trusting that, having a Heart Like a Dog, she will forgive whichever critter was the cause of this fowl foul up.

Always Late but worth the Wait!

I’ve been bad, I know!  We are excessively grateful for our awards but also, it appears, frighteningly easily distracted by the likes of competitions, law cases (Molly and Doggie), Springbok stories and absurd mini-blogroll competitions.

I’m hoping that my fabulous readers and Award givers will take a page out of my long suffering Mother’s book who says I’m “Always Late but Worth the Wait”.  She even bought me these funky slipslops to prove it!

ALWAYS LATE BUT WORTH THE WAIT!

Of course, she is totally biased, as the laws of nature determine Mothers’ must be.

Don’t get a shock at the number. It’s purely because I’ve stacked them up for quite a while.  These awards are accepted with ludicrous elation by the rescue animals!

Hurdles to Happiness awarded us, ages ago, the Sunshine Award

Sunshine Award

Jodi Stone, equally long ago, awarded us the Sisterhood of the Bloggers award

Sisterhood of the World Bloggers award

Dockfam Adventures, Mollie & Alfie, and Raising Daisy, awarded us the Beautiful Blogger

Zac the All Black (now The Princess Tails with Zena) awarded us the One Lovely Blog

Donkey Whisperer  sent us the Kreativ Blogger award

It’s a Pussy Cats Life sweetly sent us the Super Sweet Blogger Award

plus the

Addictive Blogger Award, which we also received from The Misadventures of Misaki, Angels Whisper and Misty Shores Chesapeakes.

Having received some of these awards before, we decided to abide by the rules of the Addictive Blogger Award.  This allows us to eliminate a degree of embarrassing personal facts and, rather, tell you why we started blogging.  A much easier task!

This blog aims to raise awareness for the superb Pro-Life Animal Shelters in South Africa.  The awesome people running these organizations give up their entire lives to this daunting task.  They take in, feed, love and care for the neglected, abused, orphaned and injured animals.  They do not euthanise but, if suitable homes cannot be found, take these animals in for life.  The amount of work, time and dedication involved in ensuring that the animals not only get to live but have a life worth living, is so immense that many are left little time to promote themselves.  This is where I come in.  I have made it my task to raise awareness.

There are so many incredible blogs, each utterly deserving of awards.  This is stupendously difficult.  This post is already absurdly long so I am offering the following sites any of the above awards that they may not yet have:

Comedy in Crisis – Hilarious and well worth a read.  This site, from Cape Town, South Africa, will show you how to deal with adversity with a smile!

Granny 1947 – From the Eastern Cape in South Africa.  This is one funny granny.  Hop over and find out a bit more about life in our beautiful country.

Teedeevee – How brilliant to find a blog concentrating on the wonderful things in Johannesburg, South Africa.  This site might just change your mind about our city.

Birding Zimbabwe – A fantastic birding site from South Africa’s bordering country, Zimbabwe.

The Princess Tails – This site used to be called Zac the All Black, as  I’m sure most of you know it but I thought Zena needed a little confidence boost, now that she has, sadly, had to take over the reigns of blog fame.

Georgia About – What a fantastic place.  I have learnt so much about Georgia from this brilliant site.  Will have to visit there sometime.

Doggy’s Style – Yes Doggy, this is officially bribery.  Having been put in charge of keeping you under control in Mollie & Alfies competition, I thought an award might soften your trigger happy snipers a little.

Hey It’s Jet Here – Because Jetty the Gentleman (or Gentledog, more appropriately) deserves every award possible for his delightful, kind and forgiving nature.

Easy Weimaraner – Because Litchi thinks Easy is HOT!  She’ll be very embarrassed that I said that though!

We adore getting awards, so we hope that there will be plenty of opportunities in the future, to pass awards on to the sites I have not mentioned today.

A Royal Pardon!

Lady Litchfield Love of Litchfield, Staffordshire, hereby extends to Jet the Fabulous, of Hey It’s Jet Here, a Royal Pardon for her misconduct with regards to the Mini-Blogroll Competition post.

Lady Litchfield Love

My Dear Jetty, although Litchi (Lady Litchfield) had managed to capture you on her Awesome Blogroll Competition Winners list, she had, due to extreme brain-wave decline, neglected to add you to the List Of Winners in her post.  Being of Royal decent, she finds herself unable to hang her head in shame, finding that her upbringing within the Stiff Upper Lip society, has bred this out of her.  However, if she were able to, she most certainly would.

As compensation for her blunder, she offers to you, a post dedicated to Your Royal Fabulousness.  She trusts that your forgiveness will be forthcoming, as she is particularly aware of the eye-crossing, mind-boggling efforts you went to in order to assist her in the Le Clown blogroll contest.

Jet The Fabulous, you are held in the highest regard by this dynasty and your magnificence is awe-inspiring.  Litchi and the Rescue Animals of the world unite in their admiration of you.

Your faithfully

Lady Litchfield Love

Litchi’s Royal Pardon

The Awesome Blogroll List! Competition Winners Unite!

THERE IS NO REASON FOR THIS PHOTO – I just know you like to look at pictures! This is Ashley, a previous bottle-feeder foster kittie

I know I’m mad.  The voices in my head tell me so.  Being a nutter, I pinched Le Clown’s idea and ran a mini-blogroll contest of my own.  This was a positively preposterous idea – leading to untold hours of complete confusion on my part.

The entries were easy enough!  The creation of an ordered blogroll list was, on the other hand, absurd!  WordPress could, of course, have kindly allowed me to simply “drag” the blogroll widget across and edit the entries from there.  But no!  Why would they make my life easy?  Instead, I was inflicted with the admin (my downfall) task of creating individual links, under categories that, for reason unknown to myself, only allow 20 at a time, for each and every blog.

I trust you are thoroughly impressed and utterly delighted to be featured, as my once fabulous but now imploding electrical brain circuits have officially revolted (no, they are not “revolting”, they are staging a “revolt”) and I can no longer process enough data to make a simple cup of coffee.

So, to avoid any further brain-freeze, I shall move swiftly onto the list of Mini-Blogroll Contest Winners, who are now listed under Awesome Blogroll – Competition Winners!  These utterly superb sites, that helped keep me in Le Clown’s competition, are as follows:

Mollie & Alfie

Doggy’s Style

Madame Weebles

Dockfam

Easy Weimaraner

Molly the Wally

Texas a cat in New York

Birding Zimbabwe

Henriettas Hippo

Serenity Spell

Oh Melvin

Granny 1947

The Misadventures of Misaki

My Small Still Voice

ShareChair

The Emes

Angels Whisper

Comedy in Crisis

Animal Couriers

The Misadventures of Misaki

I wish I could say that was it but, no, I simply couldn’t leave off people who have contributed to the success of this site and, therefore, made a valuable difference to the plight of Rescue Animals.

An additional, labour intensive blogroll has been created in honour of the Comment Contributors for the month of September.  DBS (Dead Brain Syndrome) prevented my going back further.  Check out the Blogroll – Comment Contributors list for additional terrific sites.

WWRAG (World Wide Rescue Animals Group) would like to inform all readers that this “Blogroll – Comment Contributors” list is not static.  You too can gain fame (although, probably, not fortune) and appear on this list, simply by contributing to the valuable comments.

Go on – comment for the critters!

AGAIN – NO REASON – JUST LETTING YOU LOOK AT BABY ASHLEY!

DOG MEDIATOR!

It’s a sad day in the world of animals!  Two of my favourite dogs, Mollie and Doggy have gone to war and the court case is underway.  Litchi feels that she simply cannot stand by impartially, watching friendships being ruined over simple misdemeanors relating to “Paw Tokens”.

Litchi has assigned herself as the Official Dog Mediator!  She has proposed a Plea Bargain Settlement, which is endorsed by the WWRAG (World Wide Rescue Animals Group), as being reasonable and fair.

LITCHI – The Official Mediator to the Dogs

The full details of the case, presented thus far, are available on Misaki’s blog and I would request that all readers, having now been deemed fit to adjudicate this matter, lodge your comments at Misaki, requesting that the Plea Bargain be accepted.

Many of my readers will be aware of the fact that Mollie is running a superb competition at the moment, the aim being to collect as many Paw Tokens as possible.  You would also be aware that there are two vital elements to Doggy.

Firstly: Doggy is a competition addict.  He will enter anything, just for the adrenaline rush and go full out to win! We are currently looking into DCA (Dog Competition Anonymous) help centers for him.

Secondly, and I believe most importantly, Doggy is a true Gentledog, Dog of honour and Dog of his Word.  For his selfless generosity in awarding me his well deserved and hard earned spot on Le Clown’s blog site, he has been Knighted, by President Obama no less (all kindly arranged by Mollie – the plaintiff in this scandalous court case).

Sir Doggy, as he is now officially addressed, has been taken to court by Mollie, for having misread the rules and taken a “Paw Token” meant for those who had yet to received one (he, of course, being the player that he is, had already acquired 3 of these valuable items).

This is where Litchi comes in.  Being a huge fan of both Sir Doggy and Mollie, she is, hereby, officially lodging a request for an amicable Plea Bargain to be entered into between the Plaintiff and the Defendant.

Her Plea Bargain offering is as follow:

Dear Mollie, I would request you look into the following:

• The majority of the competitors are either cats or dogs.  As such, they are not privy to the deeper understanding of legal jargon and may frequently (but with no malice intended), misread or misunderstand certain rules.

Sir Doggy:

• We understand that with your previous lack of legal mumbo-jumbo jargon credentials, you may have misunderstood Mollie’s fine print.
• We also understand that you had not expected only certain cats and dogs to be the recipients of said “Paw Token”, rather believing it to be “shared equally amongst all competitors”.
• This seems fair and reasonable as each competitor would gain equally.

Suggested Plea Bargain:

• Mollie, the plaintiff, agrees to modify the rules, allowing all competitors to acquire said “Paw Token”.  This would include Sir Doggy.
• Sir Doggy, the defendant, for his part in the misunderstanding, formally apologises to Mollie.
• Sir Doggy’s charge of “Criminal Intent To Gain Paw Tokens”, is reduced to a “misdemeanor”, with a Probationary Sentence, lasting the duration of the competition, whereby he accepts that he will not attempt to unlawfully obtain future “Paw Tokens”.

So, to all my dear readers, please help this friendship survive and hop over to Misaki to lodge your comments, requesting said Plea Bargain.