How to make BIG BUCKS out of SMALL BUCKS!

Part 1 – Acquiring Small Bucks.  Never forget – it takes bucks to make bucks!

Yes, it is possible!  The following step by step instructions will guide you through both attain and convert Small Bucks into Big Bucks.

There is no quick way (well, legally, that is) to make Big Bucks.  I will, therefore, break this into a series, thus avoiding the popping out, crossed-eyed phenomenon generated by a reading overload.

1 – Buy a farm in Africa.

  • Don’t panic.  This should be inexpensive.  In fact, try to ensure it is as run down as possible.  No-one will understand what you are doing.  The more confused your friends are, the better the buy!

2 – Put some hot, sweaty work into building a Bush Lodge, including the installation of everything from plumbing to electricity, which should not have been in place upon purchasing the farm.

  • Remember, there is no such thing as a Quick Buck.  It takes time and hard work.
  • It is vital to have no prior knowledge or experience of either the hospitality industry or building of any nature.  Prior knowledge will diminish your experience.
  • Use only local, untrained labour to complete the tasks.  This helps to grow the area’s economy and create the optimum level of mayhem.
  • Your complete lack of knowledge will give your father much needed opportunities to laugh at your expense, such as finding out you are suffering from hot flushes.
  • Diagnosis of hot flushes is fairly easy.  Wait for the plumbing to be finished.  Test a toilet and watch, mesmerized, whilst hot steam comes pouring out.  Find the wayward non-plumber and have him connect cold, rather than hot water to your thrown.

3 – At this point, have the Tourism Grading Council popping in, unannounced, to grade the establishment (remember to have as many mad builders on site as possible).

4 – Find out that 4 orphaned baby Black (extremely rare) Springbok, are in desperate need of bottle-feeding and hand-raising.

5 – Increase your building frenzy to create a thatch cover and enclosure for the babies.  Get hay bales delivered by a large tractor, making sure that it drives across your new lawn, leaving tyre tracks and strewing around as much muck as possible.

6 – It is vital to have no prior experience with Springbok – black, baby or otherwise.  This will add to the general excitement of the moment.

7 – Have the baby buck arrive at the precise time that both the tractor and the grading council appear.  This will increase the pandemonium of your Buck Growing experience.

Small Bucks Acquired

Successful Acquisition of Small Bucks

Now that you have mastered the basics, wait for “Part 2” in which we will start you on the process of taking your newly acquired Small Bucks and convert them into healthy, fully grown, Big Bucks.

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61 Comments

Filed under Adoptions, Sprinbok

61 responses to “How to make BIG BUCKS out of SMALL BUCKS!

  1. oh this eyes, and those ears!!!!… ok , I want a farm in africa, not for bucks only for living with some of this wonderful animals… (have to buy a lottery ticket first)

  2. Very funny! 🙂 Cute pictures.

  3. So cute! And they look so SOFT!!!

  4. What a sweet post… That face! That face! I’ve never seen one (Black springbok)! Poor orphaned babies — sounds as though they’re now being cared for, yes? Part deux?

  5. Sounds like quite an experience!

  6. What a wonderfully crazy time you’re having! The little Bucks are adorable. We hope you’ll share photos of when they get to be big bucks and of your lodge and all the fun and games there 😀

  7. Forget the farm I’ll bring those babies home so they can play with Doggy.
    But seriously, once Germany buys all Europe and we all are forced to speak German I’ll take on one those projects, you never know when you gonna strike gold lol

  8. Oh it would be so lovely to have a farm. All types of animals. Such a lovely cute photo..I want one 🙂 Like Easy, will have to buy a lottery ticket 🙂

    • Lovely doesn’t even begin to describe the experience. Lotto tickets are now having to be shared 3 ways then. I no longer have the farm but thought the story was well worth sharing. Deal is, whoever wins the lotto first, shares the farm with the others. Are you in?

  9. Roly

    Nothing like making big bucks in Africa. Be careful of lions 🙂

  10. They area adorable (kind of makes up for them wreaking havoc on the new construction site, I hope.)

  11. Goodness they are cute! So now you’ve gone from hospitality for humans to hospitality for animals–and they are much less exasperating!

    Tell your father just to be proud about what you are doing–though I’m sure he is! Very funny telling!

  12. Hey it’s Jet here.

    OMD! How funny, courageous, amazing, and artfully written!

  13. first, I was thinking about buckets — Oops!

  14. Is that what you’ve been up to? LOL

  15. Oh Cat! My Mom was already searching for tickets to South Africa…she thought you were gonna tell us you had a tourist place she could come visit and go on safari. That is Mom’s childhood dream…pretty much the only REALLY BIG ONE left…she didn’t have many, trust me…but she always read National Geographic growing up (Mom is now 65) and yearns to be in Africa to see the wildlife, including birds, etc. She want to see SO Africa too, Cape Town especially. One month would do it for her…sigh…maybe I must turn my blog into some “bucks”…paw pats, Savannah

    • I did have a place that I’m sure she would have loved. Pity I no longer do but have every intention of turning life around to do something similar again. Tell your mom to keep up her dream to come visit. There are so many fantastic places to see (not only in Carpe Town, although it’s certainly a must as well). Best you get working on those bucks!

  16. Hurry up with part 2, I’m busy packing.. 🙂

  17. My Mum’s still laughing – I’m going to have to poke her in a minute, ‘cos I can’t get to sleep!

    But Mum thinks that South Africa sounds wonderful, most especially the weather, as it’s been raining here for weeks!

    Big WOOFS from Solo 🙂

  18. europasicewolf

    Great post and humourously done 🙂 The small bucks are gorgeous and endearing. I’m sure the big bucks will be wonderful too. Looking forward to Part 2 😉

  19. Awaiting part 2 , don’t be too long…….with it. Enjoyed it so far. Have a great Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

  20. Now, having a hot flush is just, well, wrong. But I think your theory of converting small bucks into big ones is quite sound. And very helpful for those little ones.

  21. You are too funny! Your life should be made into a movie!! 😉

  22. Wow, how interesting and I have to say we laughed and laughed…… great post! 🙂

  23. Sounds like the start or a funny book or hilarious comedy film! Whee cannot wait to hear what happen next!

    Nibbles, Nutty, Bingo & Buddy
    xxxx

  24. Oh but they sure are cute!

  25. Adorable bucks!
    Bella and DiDi

  26. Hi, bit of a late comment here! As I’m new I’m just browsing to catch-up (thanks for visiting my blog too!). This had me smiling and laughing so much: the hot water toilet, the mad builders at the same time as the grading visit, so beautifully written.

    I’m in awe that you took on caring for springboks, but just having looked at the videos and seeing the pronk, how delightful these beautiful creatures are. The best of luck to all of you!

    • Thanks so much – I’m glad you enjoyed browsing. Sorry it’s taken me so long to reply. I seem to spend most of my time playing catch up with this blogging world thing I’ve gotten myself into. Loving every minute of it, though. Glad you had a good laugh – a very necessary thing to have every day!

      With regards to taking on the baby Springbok, I could I say “No”. I can’t say that to an animal in need and oh my, aren’t they just the most beautiful things? Who would want to say “no” to that?!?!

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